From John:
Hi Tim. Over the course of my study and the program, I have re-written my goal many times to truly express what I really want to happen, and I find that they really do help focus my mind and start getting those incremental results. I started applying the V2MOM and goal setting to other areas of my life like my diet and exercise (I always knew I would eventually get a six pack, but didn’t know how to do it). While thinking about my goals, I thought about why many people have tried many approaches to gain their ideal body but ultimately failed. I thought about it and came to the conclusion that perhaps its because they don’t have well-defined goals that is true to what the results they want to achieve. Or if we dig deeper, perhaps its because it doesn’t match with who they are at their core, and they need to change themselves from the inside out so that their actions are coherent with their “model”. I started thinking about how people would change their core. Are goals and the V2MOM model enough to do so? I am interested learning more about the subject of change. I’m wondering if you know of any books or resources that address the matter. I eventually want to apply the knowledge to myself and perhaps help others who feel like they are stuck. Please take your time to answer as I will be away from home for the next 2 days. Thank you.
– John
Why do people fail?
It’s a great question.
To change your core being, the real who you are, you need to do it incrementally, and daily. No set of goals, vision boards, V2MOM’s or anything else will do it for you. Those are reminders, road maps, self-affirmations to help you stay on track, but you have to do it on a daily basis with the ups and downs, and with the successes and failures.
Books I recommend:
- Essentialism: Greg McKeown
- Steal like an artist: Austin Kleon
- Start with why: Simon Sinek
Actions I recommend:
- A daily routine
- A Journal
- An accountability partner
- A mentor
- Honesty with yourself
- A willingness to be coached, admit when you need direction, and acceptance if you make a mistake
- A schedule
Daily habits that mean a lot to me:
- Walking outside
- Meditation
- Reading a book for 30 minutes
- Writing in my journal
- Writing on my computer
- Something physical (gym, walk, bike, etc)
- Spending time with the people that I love
- Watch a TED talk or a speech
- Listening to something on Spotify I haven’t heard before
__________________________________________________________________________________________________
I have lots to say on this topic, and I love your question, your passion for your goals and your desire to achieve them. You can do it. You need to remind yourself of that. But, to achieve anything, you have to move from 0 to 1, then from 1 to 2, then 2 to 3. Too many times, people try to go 0 to 100 (their goal) and when they don’t achieve it they end up struggling.
I watched a great TED talk just yesterday by Tim Ferris on Fear. https://www.ted.com/talks/tim_ferriss_why_you_should_define_your_fears_instead_of_your_goals
And a very good podcast recently on the topic from the folks at Fizzle:
https://fizzle.co/sparkline/dont-feel-confident-fix-fs224
I’d love to chat more with you about this, for now, I’ll leave you with what I’ve sent. Let me know if this helps or gives you some insight,
Tim Justice